不敢参加写作小组...请求拍砖一篇...谢谢！
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]3[b]1. Some people spend their entire lives in one place. Others move a number of times throughout their lives, looking for a better job, house, community, or even climate. Which do you prefer: staying in one place or moving in search of another place? Use reasons and specific examples to support your opinion. [/b][/font][/size][b][size=12pt][font=Calibri] [/font][/size][/b]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
Apparently,with the development of the transportation technology,travelling from one place to another place become much more convenience.Simultaneously,this phenomenon has aroused a storm of a debate-whether we should spend our whole lives in one place or keeping on move from one place to another.As far as I am concerned about and depending on my background,I tend to remove a number of times during my lives.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
To begin with, a new place is not only means a new environment, but also accompanying numerous opportunities. You may make a acquaintance with some interesting people from whom you can gain a lot of experience, you could find a new job which is more satisfied……the list will go on.However,it may so boring that every day we just do the same thing and face to the people who talk to you for a whole day. Here is one example which can illustrate the preponderance. One of my uncle has ever work in a telephone company for years,unfortunately,no matter how hard my uncle work, the company can hardly earn profit.Eventually,he could not endure this situation that he resigned the manager position and move to a new town.To his astonishment,he discovered the people in there were eager to buy the most fashion telephone-he find a paradise of cellphone business!As you see,He became a telephone manager again and succeeded at last.Above all,we may have to convice that new place support opportunes for you which can help you fulfill your dream![/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
What’s more,travelling to a new place will definitely help you board your insight.We shuld realize that different place have their own culture characteristic.Only when we get in touch with them by ourselves,we become much more knowledgeable about them. For instance, according to my previous experience to HONGKONG, When I was taking a taxi, the taxi driver was so enthusiastic that he kept on talking to me.During the short trip,unconsciously, I realize a great deal of Hongkong,such as the culture of the hongkong taxi,the differentiate between the two area-the kaolong and the zhonghuan,and even the location where I can eat the tasty food!Probably,it was unpractical for us to comprehend a culture just towards the radio or TV-we should find the beauty with our own eyes!Obiviously,travelling to a new place is absolutely a good choice.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
Considering all this factories above,we may be easy to find that move to a new place has much more advantages than just staying at one place.As to me,no doubt,I strongly recommend travelling to a new place. [/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]此题目来自NO.12梯队第26次作业贴，诚恳希望得到指导！::18 [/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]写成这样能拿多少分呢...[/font][/size] [[font=Calibri][size=3]3[b]1. Some people spend their entire lives in one place. Others move a number of times throughout their lives, looking for a better job, house, community, or even climate. Which do you prefer: staying in one place or moving in search of another place? Use reasons and specific examples to support your opinion. [/b]
[b][size=12pt][/size][/b]
[/size][/font][size=12pt]
[font=Calibri]Apparently,with the development of the transportation technology,travelling from one place to another[color=blue] place (delete place)[/color] [color=blue]become (has become)[/color] much more convenience.Simultaneously,this phenomenon has aroused a storm of a debate-whether we should spend our whole lives in one place or keeping on move from one place to another[color=blue].(我觉得这句话写得很勉强。没有这么严重说是一个争论，也没有应该不应该的。题目是说prefer，一个比较个人倾向的词)[/color][/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]As far as I am concerned [color=blue](i deleted some here),[/color]I tend to remove a number of times during my lives.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
To begin with, a new place [color=blue]is not only means (does not only mean)[/color] a new environment, but also accompanying numerous opportunities. You[color=blue](用I)[/color] may make a acquaintance with some interesting people from whom you can gain a lot of experience, you could find a new job which is more satisfied……the list will go on.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]However（however用在这里不准确）,it may so boring that every day we just do the same thing and face to the people who talk to you for a whole day. Here is one example which can illustrate the preponderance. [color=blue]（My uncle)[/color] has ever [color=blue]work(worked)[/color] in a telephone company for years,unfortunately,no matter how hard my uncle work, the company can hardly earn profit.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri][color=blue]就看到这里，感觉是基本的时态和一些小词用的不对，却用了一些大词。所以感觉不够流畅[/color][/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri][/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri][/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]Eventually,he could not endure this situation that he resigned the manager position and move to a new town.To his astonishment,he discovered the people in there were eager to buy the most fashion telephone-he find a paradise of cellphone business!As you see,He became a telephone manager again and succeeded at last.Above all,we may have to convice that new place support opportunes for you which can help you fulfill your dream![/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
What’s more,travelling to a new place will definitely help you board your insight.We shuld realize that different place have their own culture characteristic.Only when we get in touch with them by ourselves,we become much more knowledgeable about them. For instance, according to my previous experience to HONGKONG, When I was taking a taxi, the taxi driver was so enthusiastic that he kept on talking to me.During the short trip,unconsciously, I realize a great deal of Hongkong,such as the culture of the hongkong taxi,the differentiate between the two area-the kaolong and the zhonghuan,and even the location where I can eat the tasty food!Probably,it was unpractical for us to comprehend a culture just towards the radio or TV-we should find the beauty with our own eyes!Obiviously,travelling to a new place is absolutely a good choice.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
Considering all this factories above,we may be easy to find that move to a new place has much more advantages than just staying at one place.As to me,no doubt,I strongly recommend travelling to a new place. [/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]此题目来自NO.12梯队第26次作业贴，诚恳希望得到指导！[/font][/size] [[font=Calibri][size=3]3[b]1. Some people spend their entire lives in one place. Others move a number of times throughout their lives, looking for a better job, house, community, or even climate. Which do you prefer: staying in one place or moving in search of another place? Use reasons and specific examples to support your opinion. [/b]
[b][size=12pt][/size][/b]
[/size][/font][size=12pt]
[font=Calibri]Apparently,with the development of the transportation technology,travelling from one place to another[color=blue] place (delete place)[/color] [color=blue]become (has become)[/color] much more convenience.Simultaneously,this phenomenon has aroused a storm of a debate-whether we should spend our whole lives in one place or keeping on move from one place to another[color=blue].(我觉得这句话写得很勉强。没有这么严重说是一个争论，也没有应该不应该的。题目是说prefer，一个比较个人倾向的词)[/color][/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]As far as I am concerned [color=blue](i deleted some here),[/color]I tend to remove a number of times during my lives.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
To begin with, a new place [color=blue]is not only means (does not only mean)[/color] a new environment, but also accompanying numerous opportunities. You[color=blue](用I)[/color] may make a acquaintance with some interesting people from whom you can gain a lot of experience, you could find a new job which is more satisfied……the list will go on.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]However（however用在这里不准确）,it may so boring that every day we just do the same thing and face to the people who talk to you for a whole day. Here is one example which can illustrate the preponderance. [color=blue]（My uncle)[/color] has ever [color=blue]work(worked)[/color] in a telephone company for years,unfortunately,no matter how hard my uncle work, the company can hardly earn profit.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri][color=blue]就看到这里，感觉是基本的时态和一些小词用的不对，却用了一些大词。所以感觉不够流畅[/color][/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri][/font][/size][color=red]/.../表示删除[/color]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri][/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri][u]Eventually,he could not endure this situation that he resigned the manager position and move to a new town[color=red]./He could not edure this situation anymore,so he resigned the manager position eventually and moved to a new town.[/color] [/u]To his astonishment,he discovered the people /[color=red]in/[/color] there were eager to buy the most fashion telephone[color=red]s[/color]-he find a paradise of cellphone [color=red]selling[/color] business! /[color=red]As you see,/ [/color]He became a telephone manager again and succeeded at last. [u]Above all,we may have to convice that[color=red]/At this point, we have to admit that[/color][/u] new place support opportunes [color=red]/for you/[/color] which can help you fulfill your dream![/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
What’s more,travelling to a new place will definitely help you board your insight.We shuld realize that different place have their own culture characteristic.Only when we get in touch with them by ourselves,we become much more knowledgeable about them. For instance, according to my previous experience to HONGKONG, When I [color=red]/was taking/took[/color] a taxi, the taxi driver was so enthusiastic that he kept on talking to me.During the short trip,unconsciously, I realize a great deal of Hongkong,such as the culture of the hongkong taxi,the differentiate between the two area-the kaolong and the zhonghuan,and even the location where I can eat the tasty food!Probably,it was unpractical for us to comprehend a culture just towards the radio or TV-we should find the beauty with our own eyes!Obiviously,travelling to a new place is absolutely a good choice.[/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]
Considering all [u]this factories[color=red]/these factors[/color][/u] above,we may be easy to find that move to a new place has much more advantages than just staying at one place.As to me,no doubt,I strongly recommend travelling to a new place. [/font][/size]
[size=12pt][font=Calibri]此题目来自NO.12梯队第26次作业贴，诚恳希望得到指导！[/font][/size]
[size=3][/size]
[size=3][color=red]搬到新地方能遇到新的人，新的机遇。你还可以亲眼看看外面的世界[/color][/size]
[size=3][color=#ff0000][/color][/size]
[size=3][color=#ff0000]挺好，再写几篇贴上来看看[/color][/size] 谢谢！！！
页:
[1]